Vicky - Broadcasting Life through Friendster

I’m actually doing pretty well now. It’s just those days when little things make you cry and hope it was just dust, but it wasn’t and you cry at that fact as well.

My heart aches when someone calls out ‘daddy’ to a manly figure nearby. Usually, the call is answered by a warm smile appearing on the man’s face. I won’t get that now, will I?

I’m still so stuck in the past in some ways, yet in others I’ve moved on so much. I’m forcing myself too hard, making life a tough one though it’s not really that bad.

I spent 3 days of CNY hoping that the past would return, that for once I could kneel in front of my parents - PARENTS - both of them, and get a thick red ang pow and know that for that entire year I’m truly blessed, (not just financially, hello?) and truly loved. I wished for firecrackers and a daddy sitting inside the sitting room watching TV, I prayed for family reunions with lots of laughter and too much talking from us kids. I longed for attending CNY mass together and visitng just after that. I ached for a bit more time, a bit more CNY time. But I was deprived.

The past won’t come flying back to you, darling me. Things like that just happen in movies, or dreams. But in real life, it’s so true and cold it hurts.. yah, just like that.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, February 20th, 2007 at 11:26 pm and is filed under my Life :). You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.